Spiritual care embraces the complete picture of the dying person and their family. This is what the special nurses of Rotorua Community Hospice recognise. They can help support long before someone dies – their care is about the journey. They respect all spiritual traditions and cultures, observing first-hand a spiritual essence that lies within us all.
My beloved husband Ian was a practising Buddhist. He accepted that impermanence is the very nature of life – a core teaching in Buddhism. Hospice nurses imbue that same deep compassion, empathy and understanding. They dedicate their time and energy, to skillfully guide and support 24/7. Their days evolve around recognizing the changing needs, wishes and subtle levels of suffering, both of patients and whānau alike – easing the path for the best possible care and comfort.
We thought Ian had the flu in September 2019 but within two weeks he was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukaemia. The next three months he spent in Waikato Hospital undergoing intensive chemotherapy. Seriously ill, confined to a Hepa Unit for protection – so far away from nature – life as we knew it had shifted focus. With complications time was required in critical care. Despite having found a sibling with a perfect match for bone marrow transplant, unable to gain cytogenic remission, Ian was no longer a candidate. We returned home to Rotorua to undergo further palliative chemotherapy. As Ian had no immunity – we were in lockdown before the nation joined us with the challenges of COVID-19. His life was in the balance, but we were so blessed with the support of skilled chemo nurses, a compassionate haematologist, generous blood donors, a wise GP, wonderful Hospice nurses and amazing work colleagues. Ian held a confident, wise stability with humour, dignity, and faith. He was aware that with dying you are in a powerful transition. He wrote specific requests in mind preparation for time of passing and for how to approach his care before, during and after death. He gently tasked Hospice / his GP / the funeral home and I, to help create the auspicious conditions he wished for dying with peace. (Advanced Care Planning at its best!). It was a time for him to prepare spiritually for the journey ahead. He wished to remain undistracted with the least disturbance possible to meditate. His deep concentrated meditation was to focus on the subtle mind. His physical cares were addressed without conversation but with loving touch.
During his last days, he rested in the practice to meditate remaining undistracted within the luminosity and all-pervading space of the true nature of his mind. To die in the unbroken awareness of this state was important to him. His wishes were upheld with respect, consideration, and support from Rotorua Hospice staff and Mountain View funeral services – a treasured gift achieved with professionalism.
With loving memory of Ian Keith Mattock 1957-2020.
A beautiful soul who showed his family and friends how to love, live, accept, let go and die gracefully.
Written By Andrea Mattock OM MANI PADME HUM